sarcasticsquirrel: (buffy rape front_ier)
last week on thursday i was at school and i didnt know anything would be going on that way. there were booths in the park blocks and clotheslines with shirts. so i went back after class to look. the shirts were the clothesline project. the boothes were about take back the night. the shirts were from people who had been victims of sexual violence. take back the night is about ending sexual and domestic violence.

the shirts were hard to read. it hurt to see all that pain. i got a take back the night shirt, a safety whistle, and a button that says consent is sexy.

a lot of the time im ok. but i still dont know how to deal with the rape. and it comes up at random moments. like today zach and i were wrestling and he had his eyes wide and angry looking and he was holding my wrists and i was pinned down on the bed and i freaked. i didnt tell him why.

they had a booth where you could register your penis. guess it was saying that you promise not to harm people with it or something. peter seemed angry about this. i understood his point but i understood why they did it too.

there was a guy playing ani songs and other stuff, it was nice in a way.

i came back in the evening. listened to the speakers. the survivors telling their stories. that was hard. then i made a shirt for the clothesline project and hung it up. that was also hard. and i put some really personal stuff up there. then i sat and listened to more of the speakers and tim met me and held my candle for me cuz im afraid of fire.

that was a hard night. i still need to deal with a lot of this. im still hurt and afraid.
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sarcastic squirrel

January 2017

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